Everton V Stoke Report

Following last month’s defeat to Newcastle, David Moyes stated he would be going back to basics.

Yesterday’s gritty victory over a dogged Stoke side was built on the very foundations of seasons past - solid defending, pinching a goal and defending the lead to claim a deserved three points.

Confidence may not exactly be coarsing through Toffee veins just yet but momentum is certainly building having bagged ten points from a possible 12 in October and stretched our unbeaten run to five league games.

Having eradicated the errors, Tim Howard at Spurs apart, that blighted September, the blues are now certainly heading in the right direction.

But wins will not come much harder than they did yesterday. Everton battled their way past Tony Pulis’s unpalatable Stoke by remaining patient and trying to play football, whereas the Potters came for the draw and seemed happy to try and play down the clock from as early as the tenth minute.

Consequently, what ensued was a battle of attrition that hinged on two second half incidents.

The first when Tuncay was harshly adjudged by fussy match official Lee Probert to have pushed Leighton Baines before bundling the ball over the line.

If the visitors felt aggrieved, Yakubu was about to rub salt in the wounds. The big Nigerian did well to nick the ball off Abdulaye Faye and find Tim Cahill with an intelligent pass. The Australian thumped his 20 yard drive against the upright but the rebound fell straight back to Yakubu who controlled, sidestepped a challenge and crashed an unstoppable shot into the roof of the net.

It was the first goal for the 28-year-old since April and, with his duck finally broken, hopefully the burly striker will rediscover his confidence and recapture the kind of goal scoring form he was in prior to his 12 month injury lay-off.

Having found a way through Stoke’s stubborn rearguard, Everton then played the game out by trying to pick Stoke off on the counter attack.

It was an unnecessarily risky strategy, as Stoke, for all their abbraisive style, have players in Kenwynne Jones, Tuncay, Jermaine Pennant, who came on as a second half substitute, and the impressive Matthew Etherington, who can punish teams.

But Everton held firm to claim their third win of the season and climb up to seventh place in the table, just two points behind fifth place Spurs.

In the aftermatch press conference, Tony Pulis bemoaned his side’s luck, claiming the big decisions are not going Stoke’s way at the minute, adding that he believed his team would have won had Tuncay’s effort been allowed to stand.

Obviously, he is failing to acknowledge Matthew Etherington’s trip on Baines in the penalty area that should have resulted in a penalty for the home side and that his side failed to get a shot on target all game. Anything other than a home win yesterday would have been harsh in the extreme. In September, that may well have been the case but, thankfully, Everton have indeed gone back to basics and rediscovered the art of winning ugly.

We now enter into November, a month which includes games against Blackpool, Bolton, Sunderland and West Brom - exactly the sort of games we need to be winning to consolidate the progreess made in October and more ugly wins could well be the order of the day.

But with the likes of Jack Rodwell, a surprise inclusion on the subs bench, Maouane Fellaini and Louis Saha, who made a brief cameo appearance, all edging back to fitness, the future is suddenly looking brighter.

The season thus far has been a bit of a roller coaster ride, starting off low, we now find ourselves on a high. Quite fitting, then, that our next challenge takes us to Blackpool.

Man of the match: Sylvain Distin

Grab68

Stoke Preview

 

 

Everton return to the Green Green Grass Of Home tomorrow having taken their unbeaten sequence to four at White Heart Lane last weekend.

 

Following a wretched start, the Toffees look to have turned the corner, having negotiated a tricky run of fixtures without defeat, we now embark on three very potentially winnable games, starting with tomorrow’s visitors Stoke.

 

But, this is Everton, and  having fluffed our lines against the likes of Blackburn, Wolves and Newcastle, only to then take all three points against the infinitely more dangerous Birmingham and Liverpool and not lose at Spurs, it would be typical of Everton not to turn up tomorrow and hand the game to the visitors, it’s what we do, It’s Not Unusual.

 

However, with Mike Arteta likely to return to the starting line-up, Yakubu beginning to resemble the player he was prior to his lengthy lay off and Seamus Coleman giving us a genuine option down the right, things finally look to be slotting into place. All we need now is for Distin to get injured so Moyes will stop playing Heitinga in midfield. To be fair to Distin, he has has showed glimpses of quality recently, but the Purple Akie lookalike always appears to have a Titus Bramble moment in him and Heitinga, on last season’s form looks the far better bet to every Evertonian apart from David Moyes.

 

So that’s Everton, what will the team from the Britannia bring to Goodison tomorrow. Presumably they will try to keep matters tight, use the pace and directness of Etherington and Pennant, if fit, down the wings and the hustle and bustle of Jones up front. Add the threat of Rory Delap’s throw-ins and the defence will certainly have their work cut out.

 

Tony Pulis, who would not look out of place on a Crimewatch most wanted appeal, has assembled a decent side who, for all their rough and tumble attributes, can mix it up a bit and play some nice football at times. In short, exactly the type of team who have caused us problems this season.

But for all Stoke’s  bluster, Everton are the better  side with better players and had the unwanted luxury of not playing League Cup football this week – whereas Stoke huffed and puffed for two hours.

 

All things considered, everything is set up perfectly for the Toffees to  record their third win of the season – and they will do if the players apply themselves as they did in the last home outing. Do that and we will not have to endure too many renditions of the Tom Jones’ classic, Delilah, which is sung by Stoke fans for reasons I cannot be bothered explaining.

 

Three points and the climb up the table will see the blue half of Merseyside experience almost Funny Familiar Forgotten Feelings. We won’t exactly be Burning Down the House but at least we will Keep On Smiling.

 

Now, if anyone can shoehorn The Young New Mexican Puppetteer into the match report, they are a better man than me.

Grab68

Time for Kenwright to do the Twist



"How much?  Are you takin' the piss?"



Using card game analogies in football are common; who will blink first, calling your bluff, Ace in the pack, the list could go on and on.

 But watching Everton and listening to some of their supporters these days is almost akin to watching the most unimaginative Pontoon player, the one who sticks on 16 every hand he’s dealt. We’ll come back to this later.

 Listen to any set of Toffees, or visit any forum and you will come across the Kenwright debate. The debate which has split the Everton fanbase in two.

 In the blue corner, there are those who suggest Kenwright is not looking to sell, despite his protestations to the contrary, and that he has been searching 24/7 for the past eight or whatever years for investment, enabling him to remain as a chairman, or some sort of figurehead .

 In the other blue corner, are those who claim Uncle Bill the boyhood blue has done a wonderful job overseeing a period of stability which sees the club with its best manager and squad since Howard Kendall’s first managerial stint and that they do not want him to sell amid fears of a situation similar to that at Portsmouth - or even Liverpool - being incurred.

 There is ground for both arguments and respect should be given to all fans, who want nothing but the best for Everton FC.

 But, in the current financial footballing climate, even the most blinkered supporter would acknowledge that Everton are very unlikely to make serious inroads to the top four without a major injection of cash. As the ongoing search for investment continues to draw more blanks than Jermaine Beckford, maybe the impresario should have been looking for a buyer.

 How do we know he hasn’t, I hear you ask? We don’t but, as just about every club in the top flight has been bought - some two or three times over - since David Moyes’ appointment, it seems harder and harder to fathom as to why one of the top five most successful English clubs in the best league in the world has not received one genuine approach during that time – and if we have, why it was never successful or even picked up by the press?

 Only interested buying parties, Bill Kenwright and the powers within Goodison can honestly answer those questions but as Mr Kenwright said the subject ‘bored him’ when asked by a concerned shareholder during an AGM, don’t expect to be hearing any revelations from that diection any time soon.

 In the meantime, it is left with the fans ruminating as to what is the best way foward. To sell or not to sell. Those in Kenwright’s pro corner are the aforementioned Pontoon player, remember him? He’s the player nursing 16 but always refusing to twist in the hopes the Banker will go bust first. It is a tactic that will deliver some short term victories but will, essentially, see the Banker win out.

 Transfer the analogy to Everton and what we have is a good manager and a good squad who will pick up a decent win against Man Utd, Chelsea and Liverpool along the way but will never win the big pot because they refuse to twist – the twist in question here is the chairman handing over the reigns to someone with a bit of financial clout.

 If we continue to stick on 16, so to speak, we will eventually slip away because those with the finances to blow us out of the water will continue to nab our transfer targets, like Spurs did with Kyle Naughton, nab our players, like Man City did with Joleon Lescott and nab our place in upper echelons of the Premier League, like has happened last season with Spurs, Man City and Villa all finishing above us and looking more than capable of repeating the feat this season. Only Liverpool’s hilarious demise is offering us a crumb of comfort.

 So, in football’s high stakes game of Pontoon, Bill has to twist, hope he can find the next Abramovich or Sheikh Mansour and sell sooner rather than later. The alternative is to limp along as we are and eventually return to a club that sells its best players to those with the money to compete and, sadly, become the relegation-haunted club of the ‘90s again.


Speaking of the ‘90s, if Everton fail to win the FA Cup this year, it will be the 16th consecutive season without a major trophy finding its way to Goodison Park. Now there is a 16 we would all be happy to stick on.


Grab68

Things that scare me............

Comments made by people on Youtube. The video could be one of a cat getting volleyed up the arse or Tim Cahill's boss overhead kick against Chelsea, either way some biff has to rant about how the illuminati or the Jews are actually taking over the world and if don't agree you're either a sheep or an apologist.

The Blob Shop in Town. This is a pub for people who may as well just have a sign above their head saying "I have given up on life".It has a décor that even a blind person would be disgusted with, and I reckon the pints there would give you the shits for a millennium. Just walking past it and smell you get from it is enough to make you want to give up on life.

Moyes leaving us. Thee time will one day come where the Armani cardigan wearer will leave for pastures new and when that day comes we could be back to mid table mediocrity at best. We've improved so much in his time here that the days of Walter Smith seem like a foggy Victorian nightmare that you have to sometimes ask "did that really happen did I really see David Unsworth upfront?".The fear on top of him leaving is we end up with someone like Gary Megson, hopefully Kenwright will choose someone decent or all the hard work done by Moyes could be undone.

Them Tea Party activists in America. This is a prime example of fuckwits getting involved in something they don't have a fucking clue about. If you want healthcare for everyone you're a socialist, Obama's a secret Muslim and the banks have bought you from birth. Instead of getting involved in a debate and getting their argument across intelligently and backing it up with fact they seem to think that by screaming and intimidating they will win. If they even get a sway of power over there it could be a worrying time in the future.

Iran, Where's my dinner jacket seems to be expanding his influence all across the middle east whether it's Lebanon, Iraq, or even Afganistan. Obviously we're no saint in that area but this is a fella who would quite gladly wipe Israel off the map, and seems to think the Holocaust was a bit of a lie, and George Bush's nan organised 9/11.If they get the old nuclear weapons on the go then it could lead to them becoming a middle eastern super state which will mean it wont exactly be a barrel of laughs out there.

Alex

Once a........

We hate him so much because we loved him so much, and he had every little Evertonian's dream in the palm of his hand.

Manchester Utd fans who are upset about Wayne Rooney wanting to leave now know exactly how we felt five years ago. His dramatic u-turn was laughable and to say he's worried about bringing in more better players than getting a 120% pay rise is a smack in the mouth to any football fan up and down the country.

 Ever since he walked out Everton FC five years ago, he was history in my eyes.

Dixie Dean was offered time and time again the chance to leave, but did he? No, because he loved Everton. I hated Wayne Rooney the minute Everton offered him the opportunity to be the highest earner in the club's HISTORY, and he turned it down. He hasn't cared less about what has happened to Everton since, and only for David Moyes - who knows ?

For him being supposedly the massive Evertonian he is, all the money in the world wouldn’t have stopped me leaving my Everton.

I'd give my right arm to play for that football club. I've often wondered what he thinks when he hears "we hate Scousers " every week.
Yes, he's a fantastic footballer, but so what ? Give me Tim Cahill every single week. He's been offered better contracts elsewhere, but choose to stay at Everton because he knows about what kind of lifestyle Everton Fc have gave him. Tim Cahill is 100% more an Evertonian legend than Rooney could ever hope to be, and will ever be.

If you honestly think Wayne Rooney loves Everton that much, then why did he leave in the first place on deadline day when Moyes' hands were tied ? Why doesn’t he celebrate with his Manchester Utd team mates instead of running the bottom end of the old Trafford pitch just to have a go at us ? Rooney might have been brought up like some of us, and he would be doing exactly the same thing giving an ex Everton player stick if they left at 19 to join Man Utd.

If it wasn’t for footballing scout and gentleman Bob Pendleton, the lad could possibly be doing what some teenagers are up to in this society, and not once has he acknowledged Bob since his fame.

Rooney's forgotten about in my eyes, we've moved on to better things since then, and are much better off without him.
Any Evertonian who would like to see Wayne Rooney back in a royle blue shirt needs to have a long hard look at themselves.

Hand on heart I can honestly say I would still be an Everton player if I was in his boots.

What's money ? - he and future generations of his family were already set for life when Everton offered him £50,000 a week.

What's trophies ? - just winning one premier league match with Everton would mean more to me than winning the European Cup with utd.

Imagine in 50 years time how proud your grandchildren will be around Goodison still talking about you. "That's my granddad that", - the Legend status that you set. Can you honestly imagine Man utd fans still talking about him in 100 years time ? He'll just be some lad from Liverpool who played for them.

He could have been an absolute Legend at Everton adored by Evertonians of every generation. I'm 27 now but when I was 19, the way I was brought up I can tell you it would take a lot more than bad advice from my agent to get me to ever leave the club I have loved all my life. And I would so easily of loved to been held in the same breath as Dixie Dean, Alan Ball, Brian Labone etc.
Never ever forget !

From
An Evertonian with a heart

It's not County Road

Real Madrid v AC Milan. Two of World footballs great teams, head-to-head in one of the games shrines.

Last Wednesday I was lucky enough to get two tickets for this Clash of the Titans. This game had been built up all week as the first test of Mourinho's revolution, added to that we had the return of Robinho and the chance to see some of Europe's top show ponies: Pirlo, Seedorf, Ronaldinho, Ibrahmovic, Ronaldo, Ozil. You could say I was fairly excited.

Obviously this type of affair doesn't come cheap, 50€ for the cheap seats up to 150€ and touts asking for 200 to 500 outside the ground. Thank God for contacts.

The pre-match entertainment was provided by Milan's Ultras and Madrid's finest, a quick bouncing on the toes by the Ultras followed by a charge by the Police and it was all over. Obviously as history shows there is no Italian version of “Stand!”.

I know our neighbours go on about their special European nights, but the Bernabeu on the night of a big game is something special. The noise in the streets around the ground is just what you would expect; loads of tooting horns, flags and lost tourist types (so a bit like Anfield).

The atmosphere at the Bernabeu is normally atrocious but for Eurpean games it does kick up a notch, led by a sad gang of fascists behind the south goal, the Ultra Sur, knobs to a man. The ground has various levels and pitch level is below street level, something English clubs do nt even seem to consider when looking at increasing capacity.

Just time for a few cañas, they aren't big drinkers and you wont find anything like the Chepstow round here, the ground is built in a very well-to-do neighbourhood.

So to the game, that god awful Champions League music belted out and we were all set.
To be honest it was a bit of a disappoinment, all over basically in 15 minutes with two of the spawniest goals you could wish to see. This didn't stop the crowd going mental. Milan built the worst wall since Heysel, Ronaldo snotted it , one nil. A minute later it was two, the very impressive Ozil hitting his shot into the floor and in off  a defender's head. No idea who. Pirlo had a good effort from a free kick, don't know if Casillas saved it or it hit the bar. (It's amazing how much you don't see if you actually go to the match isn't it?).
Half time came and everyone in sight opened up their “bocadillos”, big sarnies, this is tradition at all Spanish games. It also provides tinfoil to throw at the pitch.

Madrid dominated the second half, Robinho came on to some comedy booing and had a good effort saved and Ronaldo, surprisingly, treated to us to some comedy diving and one ludicrous penalty claim. So it ended, hugs all round and into the night for a few late drinks.

If that had been us the bars around the ground would have been bouncing long into the night, Spain as their old ad used to say is different. Everyone just buggers off leaving the bars empty, which was nice.

All in all a good night, test passed, pity they won but you can't have everything. If you ever get the chance to come over and get to a night match jump at the opportunity. I would still rather be at Goodison any day but it will do for now.

P.S. Thanks for the tickets Juan.

Feelingbluer

Tottenham Preview

"He's a triffic lad, with a triffic attitude"

Everton travel to North London tomorrow for the ‘dinner time’ kick-off against Tottenham.

Recent seasons have seen Everton’s performances at White Hart Lane improve dramatically, last season’s first-half apart.

Despite Redknapp’s ironic whingeing prior to the game about a virus infecting the club, Everton’s poor first half display ensured the hosts were comfortably ahead at half-time with goals from Pavlyuchenko and Modric

Although there’s talk of Yakubu banishing the demons of his injury tomorrow, he did manage to pull one back for Everton 10 minutes into the second-half, immediately before Rodwell drew a good save from Gomes. Ultimately the first-half is were the game was lost, painfully highlighted with three more chances from Pienaar, Jagielka and Donovan, the latter an absolute sitter.

Tottenham’s defence can be described as ‘leaky’, and after their mid-week excursion we’d hope we’re at them from the first whistle to avoid a repeat of February’s game.

So let’s hope for a triffic game played with a triffic attitude, and if Harry’s kite is twitching off the bone at the end of it, it’ll be a triffic bonus.

I'm Dead Mad, Me

It’s being reported as Blackpool Manager, Ian Holloway, coming out in support of Alex Ferguson’s predicament and against all that’s evil in football. When in reality, it’s only confirmed he’s a sycophantic attention seeker.

"What if he sits there for 18 months, throws tantrums, doesn't try, doesn't play, and someone's already said to him, 'We'll take you and we'll pay you some of that money we should have paid Manchester United because you can walk out on a free'?

"Do you want to sign a person like that? Do you want to play for a club that says that to you? How do we know it hasn't already happened? The game is wrong.
"If Alex Ferguson is being bullied by a player and his agent how wrong is the game? When are Fifa and Uefa going to listen to the people who are involved in the game?

Whilst the contract situation’s a good point it’s hardly news. Which leads us onto poor Alex being bullied. The same Alex who’d been ‘interested’ in Rooney since his early teens and ultimately forced Everton’s hand to part with him for a mere 20m, if you consider Rooney helped earn the bonuses we recieved, and much more on top of that which never reached our coffers.

"Manchester United have helped Wayne Rooney's career massively on and off the field. The manager, the club itself has invested in him. They bought him for massive amounts of money as a young man and they're helping him blossom into the player that he is. “

If this massive, gaping arsehole is the type of man footballers look up to and are inspired by, it only serves to confirm what we already know; Ian, Alex and Wayne - you’re all wankers, pipe down and get on with it, eh?

Where's the brasses, lad?

The Other Rooney

Born in Liverpool on 31 March 1902, the day upon which, courtesy of a lone
Jack Sharp strike, Everton defeated Nottingham Forest 1:0 at Goodison Park
before a crowd estimated at 20,000, right-half Walter Rooney joined Everton
some time in 1924, debuting for the club in, coincidence of coincidences, a
3:1 Goodison Park triumph over Nottingham Forest on 28 February 1925.

During his five-year stint on Everton’s books he remained very much on the
fringes of the first team, mustering a grand total of just fourteen First
Division and four FA Cup appearances for the Toffeemen, of which Everton
won six, lost nine and drew three, prior to joining Wrexham in late 1929.



His sole claim to Everton fame is that he appeared in the same Everton side
in which Dixie Dean graced the club’s colours for the first time in a 3:1
reverse at Arsenal on 21 March 1925.


Walter Rooney died in January 1963 aged sixty.


Blaukraut

Paces and Angles

The request for pace in Everton’s side is a long-running demand from a lot of supporters, but what does it actually mean?

It’s hard to argue against the virtues of having pace to attack with, and of course the more media-savvy ‘counter attack’, but is it important to all teams?

If you’re capable of dominating the midfield whilst pressing the back-line of the opposition, is pace paramount in converting it to goals? It’s generally conceded we’ve been ‘crying out’ for pace in the past few seasons but we’re still a team capable of beating anyone on their day.

The sign of an individual champion is their commitment and ability to be above average at every aspect of their chosen field, but as a team the effectiveness alone should be held-up as an a example, and as a team we’re capable of getting the better of anyone, so maybe the fabled step-up’s psychological.


The clamour for Dennis Rommedahl, more athlete than footballer, and the subsequent losing out to Charlton for the honour of paying him for turning-up for P.E., proves it’s difficult at best to specualte what’s best to move ‘forward‘, although the needs of the team back then were different, it seems the most prominent demand was, and still is, pace.

 If Moyes is lucky/savvy enough to sign a player with both pace and ability for an affordable price, it’ll be another sign of his importance to us, as he’s already proved with the squad he’s put together.

Rooney

 
So today’s seen the confirmation that Everton’s Prodigal Son wants to quit Manchester United, Alex Ferguson is “shocked” and has said “I couldn't believe it, as in earlier discussions, as early as March, he intimated he wanted to stay and sign a long contract, he was happy at the best club in the world and I was very terribly disappointed as we couldn't quite understand it.”

Why he’s shocked is a mystery, similar noises were made in a different context not long before he left to move in with his estranged father, who’d nurture and guide the precocious talent only he understood. Concluding with England winning the Worl…..

Would you have him back? Whether you would or not, it’s unlikely he’ll play for us in the foreseeable, given he’s got over 18 months left on his contract. For those amongst us who wouldn’t , you’re lying to yourself if you wouldn’t swap him for Beckford at the tip of a full-strength 5 man midfield, which is the formation were he scored 34 for United last season. It’s pointless anyway.

Ferguson added, with a straight face “We've done nothing but help him since he came to the club and that is another mystery. We've helped him with his private life(pause)and other matters.” What could those other matters be? ‘tracking’ him since he was in his early teens? Who knows.

Once a cúnt, always a cúnt

Unlucky, Ferguson

Me an r kid at the Olympia

Everton V Liverpool

Yesterday’s derby was certainly a strange one, with the two week build-up and the drama at Liverpool allowing people’s expectations to differ massively day-to-day.

The one constant seemed to be Evertonians' quiet confidence, although we’ve had that feeling before going into derbies it’s always pricked by the foreboding feeling of Liverpool’s divine right to ‘beat de bitters’, usually helped along by the employees of the Premier League, who clearly have no vested interest in Liverpool’s status as an attractive marketing tool, as proven this past week…..

Anyway, yesterday was different, the extra ability they usually have is no longer there, which makes it much harder for the boys in black to hand it on a plate.

We were on top from the first whistle, to the bemusement of ageing lesbian, John W Henry.  The pressure finally paid when Coleman got his head down and ran at their left-side, pulling it back for Cahill to smash it  home - 1-0.

The injured Osman was replaced at half-time by young lesbian Bilyaletdinov and once Arteta scored the second soon after, pouncing on a poor clearance and guiding it in with the outside of his boot, even the most pessimistic of blues were having trouble convincing themselves ‘they’ll still win this’.

The optimism was such that even the withdrawal of Arteta with 15-20 minutes left, replaced by Beckford, failed to give us anything to fear.  Although we sat back as a result there was a feeling we had another gear to go up to if necessary, as opposed to our two-stroke opponents.  Who are hopefully stuck in reverse.